What Is your definition of success?

Like many of us do, consciously or unconsciously, I did buy "formulas for success" but when observant of my life, some of my most joyful and loving experiences are "outside" those formulas and they might look more like recipes for “failure”.

Taking a straight forward example, I divorced some years back, and I married again to a man who also divorced and that has three kids. What picture comes to your mind? How a stepmother looks like? For me, not definitely the role I will apply for, specially if I wanted my life to look “pretty and neat”.

However, with time and observation, I saw how the “formulas” that I had taken were not serving me, because even though I had fallen in love, there was something else that was not making me feel as alive as I wanted, to freely and fully enjoy my life. And YES, those ideas were the ones creating my experience–the feeling, and if I really wanted to change it, I had to find inspiration to create my own definitions.

Of course, it is much easier to say than to do. Do is hard, because self understanding and self knowledge take time and require lots of discipline and brutal honesty with yourself, but I believe that the effort is worth as you realize the power you have changing only one thing, which is: Who do I think I am being here?

...Am I the disagreeable stepmother of fairy tales? Or, Am I the kind, caring, and lovely stepmother that I ever had imagined?

Or what about:

...Am I the strong results driven manager? Or, Am I the balanced manager who drives results through the art of understanding people?

...Am I the victim of circumstances employee? Or, Am I the team member that speaks up and gets involved?

...Am I part of the problem? Or, Am I part of the solution?

“It is just a thought, and a thought can be changed”...It is always a choice, It is always up to us to decide and to become the best idea we ever had about ourselves.

HOW? Just Do It, I know, it sounds very simple, but there is nothing else. It is just awareness of your thoughts, your words, and your actions, that is all. Be observant of those and commit to yourself to BE what serves you better.

You will know that it is working because those choices will make you feel empowered and peaceful. At the beginning it is a bit scary because it is new, but the more you focus on doing it, the more you do, and the more you do, you suddenly become. Stronger you will feel when you observe that the best version of yourself is the best you can offer to the world because that is how you start changing things.

Lastly, consider that, we think, we know what success means, but the truth is that we are highly open to suggestions from social media, advertising, and tv, among other powerful forces that influence what we want and how we view ourselves. Which is very natural because more than failure, we fear the judgment of failure, but, Who can tell what failure really is? Even if you have lost, that does not mean you are a looser.

Observe, observe, observe,

With love and gratitude,

Cristina,

"It is a sin to judge any man by his post"

Saint Augustine